Colombia: The only risk is becoming too relaxed

As mentioned in our previous post, you can never drop your guard in Colombia. It’s up to you, naturally enough really, to be responsible for yourself and your belongings. 

Be that as it may, it still doesn’t, or at least shouldn’t, make it more acceptable if you do happen to have something stolen while having ‘a moment of weakness’.

Scene of the crime: Oma may be upmarket, but that doesn't mean it's safer.

Que pena 

That such things happen, as they do across the globe, doesn’t mean that we should just shrug and accept them. Disappointingly, this is often the reaction of many people in these parts.

It’s the whole ‘dar papaya’ mentality, that it’s the victims' fault for allowing themselves to be robbed. ‘Silly you.’ This is linked in with the ‘que pena con usted’ expression, ‘isn’t that awful for you, but I don’t really care.’ ‘Eh, thanks, guys.’ 

Personally, having been based in Bogotá for three years now, I feel relatively comfortable in my environs and I am usually clued in to any potential threats. 

Yet, there is always the risk that you can become too relaxed. My excuse for the latest incident where I let the city’s ladrones (thieves) get one over me was that I’d just donated blood (for the first time in my life it must be said) and perhaps I wasn’t my usual shrewd self (don’t laugh).

Now, this time around the scene wasn’t your typical Wrong Way working-class venue, but rather a much more upmarket Oma café (the newly opened one in Torre Bicentenario on Carrera 4 with Avenida Jiménez), equipped with a security guard and cameras.

However, therein lies the danger; the feeling that you and your possessions are a little safer in such a place. 

In fact, it could be argued that the sheer volume of security guards employed in this country dilutes each individual one’s impact. I certainly wouldn’t be relying on many of them to have my back in a tight corner.

The "fatal" errors on my part were not having my bag in eyeshot or tied around something secure and not taking notice of the movements around me; the intense conversation I was having with an old friend was occupying my mind.

Whatever the case, the relatively well-dressed ladrones saw their opportunity and seized it.

'On the ball' security. Well, not quite ...

Thankfully, it was far from spectacular the booty they got. Basically, there was the bag itself, a few USB sticks, an old jacket (of sentimental value albeit) and a pocket-book of Spanish grammar along with an English-Spanish dictionary – at least those latter items might help our pilferers overcome their illiteracy problems.

Predictably, when we reported the robbery to the building’s administrator, her initial reaction fell firmly into the ‘dar papaya’ mindset. 

To her credit, though, she eventually showed some morsels of taking affirmative action, agreeing to set in train the process of reviewing the premise’s security cameras.* Perhaps next time she'll realise that this should be her first response.

You see, as official Colombia grapples with a potential peace agreement with the Farc guerrillas, real peace and security must come from the people, ‘el pueblo Colombiano’, each and every part of it. Taking a strong stand against all who jeopardise this is what’s needed.

There are positive signs in this regard, but by its very nature, it’s a never-ending process, consisting of many different, overlapping strands. This country, however, has too many decent people to let a thuggish minority dominate the landscape.

Yet, turn a blind eye to that minority’s behaviour and the vicious cycle will continue.
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*That process is still ongoing. Hopefully, if and when the cameras are reviewed, we’ll have a good picture of the thieves, something that we can publish.

'Que pena con usted; but at least I got my way'

It's not always best practice to take sayings/phrases from a non-native language, translate them into our own, and then take them literally. 

There are many examples in English where taking a word-for-word translation of certain expressions just doesn't make sense in other languages; 'the hair of the dog', 'beat about the bush', and so forth.

'Que pena Mr Cayman, but at least I'd the decency to wait until you died.'

Yet, the Colombian-Spanish saying of 'que pena con usted' doesn't fall into this bracket – not as far as we're concerned anyway, owing to our experiences of its use. The literal translation is 'what pain/embarrassment for (with) you'. 

This tends to be used in many scenarios in Colombia when, in the English speaking world, in any case, the more appropriate response would be 'Sorry' or 'Is there anything I can do to help?'

Now, you might say that que pena for Colombians is their 'sorry' and that's what they mean when they utter it (leaving aside the fact that there is in existence a perfect Spanish equivalent of 'sorry', namely 'lo siento', – literally 'I feel it' – which many other Spanish-speaking countries have no problem using). However, as is so often the case, actions speak much louder than words.

For example, an all-too-often 'que pena' usage is when you're in the middle of asking for something at a bar or café or the like and somebody else comes along and starts barking out his (or her – and perhaps it's more likely to be a woman) order ahead of you. 

You politely inform him that you were there first and in the middle of ordering; cue the que pena (without making eye contact) and the out-of-order order continues without a second thought for the 'displaced'. In other words, to fit the translation, “what a pain for you indeed. But I'm happy, I've got what I want, that's the most important thing.”

You could argue that there is a freshness and even honesty in this compared to much of the English-speaking world where people sometimes use 'sorry' when they don't really mean it. However, it's fair to say, in comparison with the example above for one, our behaviour in queues is generally a little more courteous and, dare we say, correct.

Moreover, an indifferent que pena is used in so many contexts where for us 'lo siento' should be the more appropriate reply backed up by a genuine acceptance of an error or misjudgement. 

In its absence, it really only leaves one conclusion; they don't care that their actions have impeded you.

It does seem like a case of 'sorry being the hardest word'; or just not in the vernacular, full stop.

The 'Bible' for some Colombians?

We can't highlight all this without touching on another, what appears to be from our experiences and those of others we've met in any case, national trait. That is an inherent inability to admit culpability to anything, even if there is irrefutable damning evidence to the contrary.

In some places, putting your hand up to say you were at fault is seen as a brave, courageous step in many incidences, a display of honesty. Not so, for the most part, in Colombia. There's always some sort of excuse available, even if it happens to be about as watertight as a teabag.

Yet this doesn't mean that you can't be at fault (well somebody has to be, right?). If something unfortunate happens to you, a typical question here is 'what did you do wrong?' for it to have occurred. 

For example, 'it's your fault that the 'ladrones' (thieves) robbed you, you allowed them to.' No 'dar papaya' and all that (and we hasten to add, the few run-ins we've had have generally been down to our own stupidity – it's not the case for everybody though). 

This, perhaps, gives some explanation as to why there appears to be at times a laissez-faire attitude towards petty crime among the locals. It happens, and if you're the victim you probably did something to allow it to happen.

'Que pena con usted' indeed. Continue to throw it our way, however, and the bigger 'pena' might be with you. We're too nice for that though. 

Plus, as we learned some time back, it's best not to take such things too seriously in these parts; nobody else appears to.