The Bogotá nomad

It has been said that the first item on the agenda of a newly formed Irish political party is the split. Ireland just doesn't do unity very well, it seems.

Houses, houses everywhere but none that suits Wrong Way ...

Borrowing from that, after over eight years of Bogotá as my base, it would seem the first item on my imaginary agenda when I move into new accommodation is, 'Where will I live next?'

A moving target

I count 16 room rentals, excluding hostels, that I've had in the Colombian capital. That is to say, two house moves a year on average, although, somewhat embarrassingly, I've just completed move number three in as many months. Come on, we are living in, wait for it, unprecedented times, so this year's upheaval is excusable.

(I'm pretty sure I would have stayed where I was from June 2019 to March of this year had there been no lockdown, coming as it did with the prospect of sharing a house with a noisy six-year-old boy — the rules of engagement changed and I didn't like what I was facing into.)

Also, it's important to note that in the period from September 2016 to September 2018 — when I returned to Ireland for a family event, uncertain as to my Colombian future — I stayed in the same place.

You could say I found something resembling comfort in that apartment share on the city's northern reaches, 175th Street just off the motorway (autopista norte). Indeed, that greater area, especially Barrio Santandercito/San Antonio, remains my "stomping ground" of sorts.

Granted, it's quite far away from the centre and "hip" Chapinero and its surrounds, parts of town that could be said to be a little more cosmopolitan — they certainly have more foreign faces about in any case.

'My Colombian life has never really felt that real.'

Despite that, or perhaps because of it, I certainly don't miss living in the historic centre, La Candelaria, for one. In terms of city living, I want for little in the far north — bar my own place of course.

So, you ask, why haven't I got that after all this time? For starters, had I known back in 2012 that Bogotá would be my home for this long, it's fairly likely I would have made finding my own place a priority, thus nipping this housing headache in the bud.

Alas, like a garden bush you keep promising yourself to trim back but never get around to it, this issue has grown rather wild over the years. Now it just seems overwhelming to tackle.

And every time I'm reminded of it i.e. I have to move again, I usually think I won't be in the city too much longer so a short-term solution is the best approach, especially from a financial perspective (that's not only the more expensive rent but also the cost of making a vacant property a home for what may only be a couple of months).

The Colombian dream

You see, I've never been at a stage here where I've said to myself, 'Yea, this is it. I'm happy with what I'm doing so if nothing changes over the next while I see no reason to leave.'

Basically, if somebody had asked me that highly annoying, completely unoriginal interview question, 'Where do you see yourself in five years' time?', from a what-part-of-the-world perspective, at no time over the last eight years would I have answered 'Bogotá'. (In fairness, my general response to such a question is, 'Sorry, my clairvoyant skills just aren't what they used to be.')

At the risk of getting somewhat philosophical here, the thing is my Colombian life has never really felt that real. I came here on a bit of an adventure, to 'give it a lash'. A return to real living, you know, a proper, relatively well-paid job, maybe even settling down, having children, that kind of stuff, that's for somewhere else, not here.

That's been my thought process in any case. Nothing this year has changed that. In fact, it's only been reinforced.

The question is, what next? Now, if I can find a satisfying answer to that in the coming months, great. To borrow from one Irish "party" that has managed to avoid the inevitable split, I still haven't found what I'm looking for (that's the band U2, in case you're wonderin). Of course, one has to define what one is looking for before it can be found.

With that in mind, I'm as confident as I can be that having my own place is a necessity. It's a start, at least.
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Bogotá's simple pleasures II: "Up the hill", "Nazi" and free beer

We’ve written before about the simple pleasures that we enjoy here in Bogotá.* In the last half year or so there have been two important additions to that list to which we must give due mention. Indeed, considering the time and money we’ve spent (well spent that is, most of the time) in both locations it would be remiss of us not to pay them homage.

They both fall into the tienda bar category – that is cheap-and-cheerful, rough-and-ready places to consume a few beers. Perhaps it’s an Irish trait, but no matter where we are in the world we always like to find a place (or two) we can call our local.

Elusive Lucio – keeping the beer flowing.

Initially, here in Bogotá’s La Candelaría district, we stumbled upon the popular, fairly reasonably priced Doña Ceci’s. It fulfilled its purpose for a while, but after devoting a nice chunk of time to the place, it became a little disappointing that we remained just another number, another ‘foreigner with money’ to the rather cold, tacaña owner. 

We don’t demand a lot, but a little appreciation and recognition from time to time that we’re good customers wouldn’t go astray – what a local should, at the very least, be about. Alas, with Doña Ceci, this was never forthcoming.

However, the tiendas where we now like to relax at the weekends (and the odd weekday) score high on those points and more. Both places are such bog-standard, Colombian drink holes that they don’t even have a name – at least not an obvious one that we’ve noticed. Thus, we’ve had to christen them ourselves (and regularly continue to wet the baby’s head at that).

So there’s Up the hill due to its location which is, predictably enough, at a bit of a higher altitude than where we live, on the borders of the supposedly not-that-safe barrios of Egipto and Belén south of the city centre. 

Then there’s Nazi bar which, perhaps not so predictably, has nothing to do with – in any meaningful sense anyway, as far as we’re aware or concerned – the fascist movement that found its home in Germany in the 1930s and 40s. 

It’s been dubbed that because the very affable twenty-something-year-old owner, Lucio, has for some reason that we’ve yet to ask him, a faint swastika tattoo on his hand. Considering he doesn’t exactly resemble nor have the ethnic background of a typical Nazi, we like to think that the symbol for him represents one of its non-violent meanings – ‘to be good’.

In any case, actions speak louder than words (or symbols) and Lucio has only ever been a complete gentleman to us. Indeed, of late he has adopted the Irish custom of the lock-in after hours. A free grande (that’s a 750ml bottle of beer, Poker being our preferred option) on our birthday was also very much appreciated. Small things, but they make a difference. 

Now, while Nazi’s grandes are a tad more expensive than our other local (3,000 pesos versus 2,500 pesos or €1.20 compared to €1 if you like – every little helps) Lucio’s friendly demeanour and appreciation to have us as patrons (how privileged he is) more than makes up for that. It also must be said he does benefit from a location advantage – he’s just a stone’s throw away from our residence.

Fun & games Up the hill. Is there anybody serving, though?

As for Up the hill, while the cheaper beer may have been the initial strongest pulling point, the treatment we receive, not just from the extremely friendly Paisa-blooded** owners and staff but the other Bogotáno regulars who drink there too, means that we feel bad if we don’t make a visit at least once a week.

Indeed, the chief owner is almost like a mother figure to us – in a good sense, that is. Not only was there free beer for our birthday, but a cake to boot. As for the other revellers who frequent the place, it’s rare we leave without getting at least one free drink landed on our table; all this from one of the city’s "poorer" regions, especially so when compared to the exclusive north.

So much have these places become what you might call our home from home, the constant salsa and vallenato music that’s played in them is almost becoming likeable for us. We’ve even been known to do a spot of salsa-ing once we’re merry enough (for a greater discussion about our Colombian dancing exploits, see http://bit.ly/S7A8eS).

All that’s missing in both places are a few prettier chicas from time to time – perhaps the ones that generally frequent the plush north could visit, just leave the attitude and arrogance at home. We can dream, can’t we?

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*'Bogotá's simple pleasures' http://bit.ly/Uzc3lk.

**Paisa is the name given to a person hailing from north-west Colombia, specifically the departments of Antioquia, Caldas, Quindío and Risaralda. 

Hostel lookers

There is no such thing as a free lunch, so it is said. However, in a number of Bogotá’s ubiquitous hostels, you can get a free breakfast. 

Of course, we’re not that naïve to actually believe this. It’s included in the price, no more, no less. 

Still, though, it’s a little extra not to be scoffed at — or to be scoffed as the case may be. And with so many hostels vying for your custom — in La Candelaria alone (the historic centre) every second establishment appears to be offering accommodation – little things such as a token breakfast can make all the difference. 

Not that many of the ‘desayunos’ on offer will set you up for the day, but it’s the thought that counts, right?

Never mind a 'free' brekkie, give us a BBQ.

So what else sets the various hostels apart? Why should you pick one over another? Well, the answers to those are case — and, indeed, time — dependent. 

We all have different needs and wants. What one person might regard as an ideal spot is another’s nightmare. However, there are certain basic requirements that practically all of us look for, regardless of the price you pay. 

For most people, security, both in terms of the building and for your personal belongings, is crucial. Secure, decent-sized personal lockers are a must together with 24/7 reception. 

While some like to get a personal set of keys to enter and exit their temporary residence as they wish, in the interests of all guests, a buzzer system is more secure, ensuring staff must always monitor those who are coming in. From our experience, the majority of La Candelaria’s hostels score high in this regard — you really shouldn’t expect anything less.

Having sufficient bathrooms for a booked-out hostel certainly helps keep everyone happy. If you’re in a private room with a toilet and shower, this isn’t a problem. 

However, if you’re dorming it, this can be an issue if the facilities are lacking. Three bathrooms between a potential twenty or more guests is pushing it to say the least. 

It helps, of course, if the actual toilet is separate from the shower, as you’ll find in some, but not all, of the more established places. Plus, we are speaking about Bogotá here and not the Caribbean coast, so hot water when you do shower is a more than reasonable expectation.  

Free internet access is a pleasant little extra. The majority of hostels have Wi-Fi which is great if you have your own laptop or smart phone. However, having free-to-use, in-house computers is a nice touch that, surprisingly, not all of the better-known places provide. If you’re trying to keep costs down, not having to pay for internet use is a help.

No Wi-Fi? Madness!

When it comes to the party hostels, La Candelaria is best described as tame on this front, especially compared to what’s on offer in some of Colombia’s and indeed South America’s other cities. 

This, however, as far as we are concerned, is not really a negative. Many of the popular spots organise night outs on a very regular basis in the city’s happening haunts. So why party in a hostel when you can get out and about and mix it with the locals? 

Another benefit of this is that if you’re not in the mood to boogie, you can get your night’s sleep in relative comfort — save for a few of the drunken revellers stumbling back into your dorm room. If you can’t beat them, join them, eh?

If your budget is tight, there is plenty of value to be found in Bogotá’s historic centre. Basic dorm rooms can be got from as little as 17,000 pesos (about €8) per night up to 25,000 pesos (over €11). That’s an 8,000 pesos swing for more or less the same facility. 

So if you’re planning on spending more than a few days in the city, a healthy saving can be made if you shop around. Plus, it’s well worth checking out if your hostel can offer you a discount for a longer stay, something that many but, alas, not all are willing to consider.

You'll certainly get plenty of smiles (and perhaps more) in Brazil.

Now, with so much choice of establishments available offering in essence the same product, does it really matter which one you opt for? Well, it’s always nice to feel welcome and wanted, especially when you happen to be paying for a service. 

Some hostel owners, though, appear to think that because it’s budget accommodation, a service with a smile is not required — a ‘take the money and run’ kind of attitude. This, we don’t like. 

Perhaps, with some, a smile is an additional extra. With others it might — alongside the breakfast — be included in the price. Or maybe it’s just free. 

Do ask before you commit. Questions should cost you nothing.