Promoting Ireland

'Ireland; a great little country, if only you could put a roof over it.'

It's difficult to go against that comedic summation of my homeland. Actually, you could add to it and suggest the construction of a few massive wind barriers as well.

Ireland's practically ever-present cloud. It does let up every now and again, though. Really, it does.

You see there's a good reason it's dubbed 'The Emerald Isle'. There are plenty of, picturesque, rolling green hills that give it a sparkling look, especially when viewed from above. That's if you could actually see the land beneath the practically perpetual, thick, grey rain clouds that smother the place.

Therein lies the Irish problem; the dull, wet weather. If it was pulled a thousand miles further south, you could be talking about one of the world's greatest tourist spots. But then again, there's the risk it'd lose a bit of that greenness; the land that is anyway, whatever about the people (well, we'd get a little redder for one).

Irish weather: Four seasons in one day (more or less) ...

Plus, an Ireland with nicer weather might tone down that fine Irish cynicism; what a terrible shame that would be for the world.

Now, needless to say, it's not always raining here (I write from ‘home’, in case you’re wondering). The odd few visitors get lucky with the sun coming out to play. Predicting when that's going to happen, though, is anyone's guess.

... from green to white, and back to green again.

As an Irish expat living in Colombia, I do, on occasions, try and talk up Ireland as a go-to destination. With a rising middle class (so it goes anyway) more Colombians are taking foreign holidays. Although you’d have to say that promoting other locations when in Colombia seems a little pointless considering the extent of its own natural beauty.

It more or less has everything in one neat package, save for violent storms. These can be good to experience every now and again, from a safe perch of course. Do note we’re talking weather-related ones, not the human emotional variety you regularly get from some Latinas.

Yet, even if my talking up of Ireland raises the interest of a visit from Colombians, as it sometimes does, the practicalities of doing so make the reality of it happening less likely.

We're talking visa issues here. The hassle of having to go through the process of applying for a separate one, separate from other European countries and the UK that is, pretty much extinguishes any enthusiasm to make Ireland part of a European holiday.

OK, with a UK visa they can visit the north-eastern part of the island, the part that is not the Republic of Ireland that is. And they could risk a run across the fluid border and more than likely get away with it. But why potentially jeopardise future travel by doing that?

If the weather fails, there's always Guinness ...

Now, the powers that be in London and Dublin have changed the rules of engagement as regards a common tourist visa for the two states. However, this little arrangement is limited to the Chinese and Indians — lucky guys. That's a bit unfair, no?

Considering all European citizens who travel to Colombia for tourism don't need to get a visa in advance — up to 90 days is given on arrival, with the option of getting another 90 after that — shouldn't the same apply for Colombians who visit Europe? (As pointed out in Soft touch Colombia, it could be argued that authorities are a little too generous in some aspects.)

So come on Ireland, take the lead, give a little more genuine substance to the motto of being 'the land of a thousand welcomes' and allow the country's doors to be opened more easily by many more.

'Open it and they will come.' Weather permitting.

A Globish affair

Many native English speakers, ourselves included, can be accused of laziness and/or indifference when it comes to learning other languages. It's a fair enough comment, especially when compared to the linguistic exploits of the likes of the Dutch and Germans, to name just two nationalities.

The fact that our language (yes, we’re Irish but we won’t pretend to be anything close to fluent Gaelic speakers) is the world’s chief business tongue means we generally more than survive and mingle in foreign countries without having to master – or even come close to mastering – others.

'Is there a refund if we don't make it across the bridge?'

Language laziness

Basically, if English isn't your first language, there’s a high chance it’s your second, or at least you desire it to be. In contrast, for native English speakers, there isn't a common second language we gravitate towards. 

Looking at our situation here, we have what we’ll describe as an OK grasp of Spanish simply because we've spent the last two years-plus surrounded by it in Colombia and elsewhere. Had things worked out differently, it could be French, German, Dutch or what have you that we’d have as our second language (using that phrase lightly). 

In other words, things happened by chance rather than design. For those with English as their number two tongue, the chances they gained it in such a similar ad-hoc manner are pretty slim.

At the risk of making an excuse for many native English speakers’ language laziness, the words of a good Israeli friend are a nice synopsis of the current state of play. 

As he opined, in a professional context in any case, knowing Spanish is great if you’re in a country where it’s widely spoken (as we have been) or if you need it for work, but, outside of that, it’s not going to win you much favour. The same can be said for most other languages. (Obviously, being able to speak and understand every language on the planet would be great, but let’s stay in the realms of reality for now).

In fact, it can be a bit frustrating when we make efforts to speak to somebody in their first language – we’re specifically referring to Spanish here – and they automatically switch to speaking English. Our Spanish isn't that bad, come on! 

Moreover, in all our travels across the world, we only need one hand to count the number of times English was not the default language when we found ourselves with groups of people from a range of diverse countries.

Taking all this on board, it leads us on to the rapidly growing, evolving and contested area of ‘Globish’ – that is of course ‘Global English’, or as some might see it, dumbed-down English. 

To put it simply, it’s the "English" you’re likely to hear if, for example – to give it a truly international or global feel considering the point we’re making – a Colombian man strikes up a conversation with a Chinese counterpart at Frankfurt airport. 

What’s spoken is unlikely to meet the approval of guardians of the English language in Oxford or Cambridge (we'll put aside Irish English for the moment), but the people in question will fully understand each other (more or less) in their common tongue.

For us, anything that helps different cultures communicate and comprehend each other is generally a good thing. 

Thus, we do our best not to frown upon what, at times, seems like the bastardisation of English. (It must be pointed out, though, that some non-native English speakers have a better understanding of the language than many native ones.)

Even, ahem, quality Colombian TV productions make some mistakes.

Now, due to its position as the global business language, it’s fair to say that there is a greater tolerance for English not being spoken entirely correctly. 

We find, and given where we’re coming from there’s perhaps no surprise in this, native English speakers are more inclined to let slide errors made by others compared to when an English speaker tries to speak in another language.

Maybe we’re just being a bit paranoid about this; but if we wanted to we could, for example, correct every second word uttered by some of our Colombian acquaintances. 

In a teaching environment, that’s obviously what we’re paid to do; but outside of that, if we get the sentiment, we’re happy to let things go. We believe it's not as smooth vice-versa. Then again, we would, wouldn't we?

With more time, this might not be an issue. Yes, we haven’t really needed excellent Spanish in a professional context here in Colombia. 

However, for matters closer to the heart, it may be prudent to be much sharper than we currently are. Then again, maybe not.

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For more on English in Colombia, check out The 'money' tongue.