Colombia's dissenters

Colombians have many things to be proud of in terms of their country. For one, a stunningly diverse landscape – from dense jungle to sparse deserts, serene coastal settings to entrancing rolling hills leading to snow-capped mountains and much more in between. With such a contrasting topography comes an array of different and colourful flora and fauna – it is one of the most diverse places on the planet.

Unspoilt beauty.

Add to this a largely helpful, welcoming populace – at least initially* – with an easy-going nature and you begin to see why many of the locals speak very highly of their land and its people. 

Indeed, for those of us who are uneasy with gushing praise in any context, such talk from some Colombians about their hallowed place, which can often descend into hyperbole, can become a little unsettling. We can all get carried away, though, from time to time.

In this regard, bearing in mind the number of locals we’ve met who won’t hear a bad word said about the country, it can be a tad refreshing to hear some born-and-bred Colombians speak in not-so-glowing terms about their homeland. A bit of balance brought to proceedings, in a sense.

Perhaps for every ten natives we meet that fall into the ‘Colombia can do no wrong’ category, we encounter about three that, if not utterly critical of the place, are certainly more focused towards its faults.

The truth – if such a thing can even be measured in this context – generally falls somewhere in between. The fact that our prime residence throughout our time in Colombia has been in the nation’s capital and largest city, Bogotá, helps to explain in some part our encounters with the more ‘negative’ (or is that realist?) elements.

Many of them are not Bogotanos, generally hailing from warmer, less crowded and, usually, environmentally cleaner parts of the country. They had to relocate to the metropolis in order to study or find work – nothing unique there, of course; an internal population flow to a country’s biggest, economically most important, city.

The majority of these Bogotá ‘blow-ins’, though, would generally prefer to be living elsewhere, back in their place of birth for one, and this contributes to the ill feeling many of them develop towards their country.

Eating on the job.

As mentioned, most of them come from warmer locations, so the relatively chilly Bogotá nights don’t help in building a ‘loving’ relationship with the capital either. 

The minus points thus start to grow; unfriendly, untrustworthy people – a big contrast with the official line that – disorganised, backwards, dangerous. In some of the conversations we’ve had with these dissenters, an actual hatred is palpable.

Again, though – the disorganised, backward labels apart – such feelings, especially of unfriendliness, are commonplace in many heavily populated cities across the globe. You tend to get a truer reflection of the soundness of a country and its people outside of the big urban centres; and in this regard, Colombia scores relatively well from what we’ve experienced and written about.**

Another aspect of what we’ll call a more rounded appraisal of the country is what Colombians now living abroad say about the place. In a recent book-editing project we undertook which featured interviews with such types, there were some common observations made.

Chief among those was the work ethic – or lack thereof, to be honest – of their compatriots back home. Now, on face value, this may surprise some people who visit the major Colombian cities. The locals generally rise very early to go to their place of employment and return pretty late – 12-hour plus days are commonplace here. There is a difference, though, between being at work and actually doing work.

As their fellow nationals, now plying their trade outside these borders, noted, there exists a more 'relaxed' approach to getting things done here. A ‘What’s the rush?’ style mentality you might call it. 

You only need to look at the ongoing infrastructure works in downtown Bogotá to get an idea of this – they’ve been at it since before our first visit here in early 2009 and there still seems to be no end in sight. Sure it’s only the capital’s city centre.

Never-ending works.

We’re all on for having a more laid-back life, but when you’re still spending most of your time at your place of work but just not doing a lot, that doesn’t sound like much fun. For our Colombian expat interviewees who have discovered the art of efficiency elsewhere, coming back to the typical way of doing things in the old country is something they’re not too keen on.

Yet despite the faults and oft-frustrating idiosyncrasies of the country and its people, for us, the many plus points outweigh the bad. It’s why we’re still here we guess.***

For some of the locals, however, getting out of the place can’t come quick enough.

Sometimes, to truly appreciate your birthplace, you need to leave it – if only for a short time. You might find, though, that the grass is indeed greener on the other side.

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*For our take on some of the less positive aspects of Colombian friendships, see http://bit.ly/LbcE9V

**A host of previous posts to choose from in this regards, including 'Finding Filandia' http://bit.ly/W1qXDw, 'Buenaventura's dirty delights' http://bit.ly/11ksFmP, 'Dirty Old Town' http://bit.ly/VG94Ho and 'Turbo Living' http://bit.ly/SVtkWW

***We did address this in some way in 'Por qué Colombia?'  http://bit.ly/W1t3DF

Six of the best in 2012 (well, kind of)

Despite the irrational and subsequently unfounded fear in some quarters that the world would end on 21 December just gone (remember all the hullabaloo?) because of a Mayan prediction, we’re still here, same as always, more or less. 

Of course, ‘officially’ the Mayans weren’t predicting the end of the world at all; it was just the end of their twelfth calendar and the beginning of number thirteen.

In any case, a large number of us use the Gregorian calendar these days, which sees us entering a new year. So, in keeping with our exceptional originality here, we’re going to look back at some of the things that we’ve derived most pleasure from in 2012. 

Well, at least we’re being outwardly positive for a change. And as you’ll see — in no particular order and far from exhaustive, by the way — there have been plenty of things that brought a smile to our face in the past year:

The Panama Canal.

Seeing more of the world

Considering it’s travelling that has us in Colombia in the first place, we’ll start off on this one. 2012 saw us add four more countries to our imaginary visited list — but far from done list (don’t get us started on that one. A very irritating turn of phrase used by far too many backpackers). 

Firstly, there were the ‘delights’ of Venezuela – it’s true, time is a great healer (for what we thought of the country at the time, see http://bit.ly/OLR2Ev).*

Then there was the very beautiful — if a little bit pricey for our modest and declining earnings — Barbados. That necessary trip to see a very good friend get married included a brief stop in Trinidad, enough, though, to take in a bit of Port-of-Spain, with its almost unbearable heat and quite friendly locals from what we encountered. 

We finished off our brief little Caribbean adventure with a longer return to Panama – we had actually walked into that country earlier in the year from bordering Capurganá in Colombia. This time around we actually got to stay a few nights; and it was well worth it.

On top of all this, we did take in more of the wonderful country that is Colombia itself, but there is still plenty more we want to see here. Time to get moving again pretty soon we reckon.

‘La Grande’ arrives

This may shock some of you, but we like a beer every now and again – the bigger (and cheaper) the better. 

For some unknown reason, though, since we first visited Colombia in 2009, all you could purchase in the majority of bars/tiendas were the small 330ml bottles. In most of the other South American countries 750 ml or litre bottles are the norm.

Thankfully this year saw Colombia get up to standard with both Aguila and Poker introducing the 750 ml bottles. Linked to this is the ‘discovery’ of cheap and cheerful tiendas with appreciative staff (are you listening Doña Ceci et al?) to consume said bottles. 

We thought we were doing well with $3,000 COP a bottle (roughly €1.20), but that’s been trumped by a lovely little place in Bogotá’s Belén district for $2,500 COP a bottle. It’s the little-big things in life that count. 

For a related article, which also details our perhaps dangerously addictive liking for value-for-money coffee and biscuits, see “Bogotá’s simple pleasures” http://bit.ly/Uzc3lk.

Game-changer.

A star is born

OK, not quite. But we did get a glimpse inside the telenovela (that’s utterly cheesy Latino soap operas) world with our work as an extra from time to time. Heck, we’re even due to appear prominently in some made-for-TV US movie, Left to Die, which is already out apparently. 

Although, we can’t help but think that we’ve already had our, precisely speaking, ’30 seconds’ of fame from this type of work. That came during our appearance in Colombia Tiene Talento (Colombia’s Got Talent), where we had to wave a flag all dressed in white for one of the acts. 

Such was the quality of our performance it made waves across the globe, with The Irish Daily Star giving us a spread in its pages. 

Alas, we failed to get the expected flag-bearer gig at the Olympics for either Team Ireland or Team Colombia. There’s always Rio in 2016... For more on this see Giving just a little bit ‘extra’ http://bit.ly/NrbPc3 and for our flag-waving extraordinaire see, http://bit.ly/TZsutM, from 2' 30".

'Flagtastic'. indeed.

Teaching English

There are times when we wouldn’t feel like putting this down as a positive, but on the whole we’ve found it quite enjoyable. 

It’s helped us meet some very interesting, decent people, both in terms of the companies we’ve worked for (firstly Instituto Nordico, now BSR Idiomas and indeed our private classes) and the students we’ve taught. 

We’ve even managed to make a little bit of money out of the whole gig — just a little, mind you. For a more thorough look at this world, see our earlier piece, The ‘Money’ Tongue http://bit.ly/V8ELH4. 

Best Man for an old-time friend

As mentioned above, the reason we went to Barbados. It was a privilege and an honour to be at the side of one of our oldest (in length of time we've been mates that is, not age, lest we insult anyone) and best friends. 

Second time to be a best man, the chances of our own tying of the knot are a long, long way off, however. We’re happy to watch from the sidelines at this moment in time; horses for courses and all that.

Picturesque.

Street arepas

OK, we knew about these round corn-based delights before the start of 2012, but it was in this year that we really got to enjoy them; simple yet wonderful pleasures. 

The perfect hunger-buster on a chilly Bogotá evening, our preference has been the ‘carne con queso’ (that’s meat with cheese with a bit of BBQ sauce to boot) for a very agreeable $2,200 COP (roughly €1). 

For those of you who know the Colombian capital, our favourite place to consume these is from the vendor that operates outside the Colombo-Americano, Calle 19 with Carrera 3. We’ve missed them over the Christmas break — come back soon.

Quality grub.

So that's some of our highlights from 2012. All that's left for us to say for now is, Happy New Year to all; onwards and upwards in 2013.

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*Please note, for an updated, more positive piece on Venezuela, see (for starters) see Venezuela: A necessary reappraisal.
 

Taking stock

Every now and again it can be prudent to take stock of your current situation. Reflect on what has happened and look ahead to what might be in store for you. 

We believe that second part isn’t as beneficial as the first as you never know with any certainty what life will throw at you next. That aside, we’ve been analysing the state of play for Wrong Way and associates in the last few weeks.

Who'd have thunk it? Wrong Way on-stage in Colombia.

We feel like it’s a good time to do so: The one-year mark has passed since we took the decision to leave a relatively steady yet limited job behind on the island of Ireland and take a semi-gamble to make what we’ve termed our ‘Second Coming’ to South America. 

So how has it been thus far? What, if anything, have we learned?

As opposed to the ‘First Coming’ to South America, which was solely travelling, this time around the aim was to see if we could source some work in order to settle for a longer term. Considering we’re still in the continent almost 13 months later, a few necessary departures apart, that first aim has gone relatively well. 

Aside from our initial, far from humanitarian, slave-like voluntary media gig in Santiago de Chile, any paid employment we’ve engaged in here in Colombia to date – from the standard hostel work and teaching English to the more unusual TV extras work (see: http://bit.ly/NrbPc3) – has been largely enjoyable and, at times, even profitable.

'In Ros Trust' — well, at least in the classroom.

If we were to pick a negative from the most profitable and reliable of those, the English teaching, it’s that our use of the Spanish language has decreased as our class hours have increased. But a lot of that is down to pure laziness on our part – we’ve plenty of time in between classes to be using and (hopefully) improving our Spanish. It comes down to desire and need in the end.

Like any place you stay in for a while and as regular readers of this blog will know, you begin to see the warts nestled among, at first glance, the more obvious beauty. 

We’ve touched on many of these ‘ugly spots’ before, from public transport manners (see http://bit.ly/N68gKL) and business dealings (see http://bit.ly/LVpK8p) to relationship attitudes (see http://bit.ly/NsJyB5) and friendships (see http://bit.ly/LbcE9V) to name but a few. 

On that latter one, outside of some notable mostly expat (although, thankfully, not exclusively) exceptions, the ability to build trustworthy friendships is disappointing. Once bitten, twice shy and all that.

Not much left to play with (above) - time to spice things up like below?

As negative, though, as all the above may seem, it’s appropriate at this stage to state we still like it here, for now anyway. Heck, if we didn’t, we wouldn’t be here. 

We can leave at any stage – well, at least we think we can. Yes, there are times when we might get frustrated with certain things or even feel a little bored – but we’ve experienced enough to know that these are emotions that can happen anywhere at anytime. Life, after all, is as exciting or as dull as you want to make it.

Possibly one of the best things that our second stint in South America – and Colombia specifically – has further reinforced for us is the adage not to take yourself, or indeed life, too seriously. 

We’re trying not to sweat the small stuff. OK, now and again, the infamous Wrong Way temper goes off; a blow-out here and there is healthy, right? But on the whole we’re concentrating on remaining positive, working on the things we can control while trying not to worry about those we can’t. 

Weighing it all up, we have to be reasonably happy with the current state of play. 

Perhaps, though, we’ve just about rode out this particular wave. The time might be fast approaching to catch another, wherever it may take us.

Giving just a little bit 'extra'

Colombia. For those unfamiliar with the place, the country conjures up images of cocaine, violent crime, prostitution and other such ‘ghastly’ affairs. 

For others, especially those who have spent some time here, they generally come away with a far more positive image of the land – relatively friendly, helpful people, fantastic scenery together with a wonderfully diverse natural environment. 

One thing, though, that the average person would not instantly think of when they hear the word Colombia is the ‘glamorous’ world of TV extras work. It’s not something that sprang to our mind anyway. 

Yet, as we’ve slowly been discovering, if you’re an extranjero/foreigner here, there seems to be a strange demand for your acting ‘talents’ – or at least your ability to stand around as an additional body while there’s a camera rolling.

In demand - getting 'made-up' for 'Colombia Tiene Talento'.

Of course, this strong demand for non-natives may just simply be seasonal – so in one sense we should ride the wave while it’s in full flow. We are, after all, getting a chance to see inside a quite surreal world that in our home country getting access to might not be as easy. 

In theory, it’s a great gig. Getting paid – eventually, that is – reasonably well for doing very little. Getting fed – eventually, that is – for free while on-set. 

For some, the chance to rub shoulders with semi-famous actors/actresses is also appealing. Plus, there’s the chance that you might get lucky and land a brief speaking part – an opportunity that presented itself to us here recently. 

There’s much more to ‘Wrong Way’s’ acting talents than being just a silent body you know – or a flag waver (see http://bit.ly/KT00gx from 2’ 30’’ onwards). 

We won’t let the fact that the speaking role is in one of the numerous, remarkably cheesy dramas – or ‘telenovelas’ to give them their proper title – that somehow are quite popular here. These ‘gems’ make Ireland’s Fair City look half decent.

So, in this Colombian extras world, if your face fits the bill – or the powers that be feel you might be able to fill a gap for them – you become very important. 

In the back of almost every extras mind, especially those who are relying on the work to survive, is the hope that they’ll become an indispensable part of a production, thereby guaranteeing somewhat steady employment for a time – evolving into a super extra, if you will. 

It could be said they’re looking for their Bart Simpson 'I didn’t do it’ moment', in a sense (see The Simpsons episode 512 – ‘Bart Gets Famous’).

Super extra: 'Your papers, please.'

Now, as exciting as all this may sound, once the novelty factor wanes, as it undoubtedly does, prostituting yourself out to various productions becomes tiring, to say the least. 

At the same speed you can be picked from obscurity to become a super extra, you are just as rapidly cast aside when you’re not wanted anymore. If that happens to be your fate, when you’re quite literally just making up the numbers, then that apparently gives the production team the right to treat you like a dog. 

Well, actually a little bit worse. At a recent shooting, where dogs were required, we discovered that the canine thespians were getting paid more than the average extra. 

What’s more, they didn’t have to hang around all day like council workers – once their scene was shot, off they went, with their tales very firmly wagging in the air.

Then there’s the food – or the waiting for it to be more specific. They do say that the quickest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. We tend to go along with that. 

So if you make us wait unnecessarily long for some grub, then you can expect a backlash. OK, fair enough, they feed you – I suppose they don’t have to. But it’s the blatant inequality of it all that irks us. 

On one side you have the ‘important’ people, dining in comfort and at will. Then you have the extras. As soon as the break for lunch is called the rush of these nobodies to the dining area is like a herd of buffalo on the charge. 

Lord help you if you’re one of the last to the queue – a long, long wait is in store while you watch the ‘stars’ and production team dine in relative splendour. 

There’s also the strong possibility that by the time you do get served, the food is either cold or there’s hardly any left.

'Save some for me, por favor!'

So, you may ask, if your lot is just a run-of-the-mill extra, why continue with it all? 

Well, as ever, money talks, so if you happen to be free when you get ‘that’ call from an agency saying your services are required, it can be hard to turn down. The aggravating, depressing aspects from the last time usually subside. 

There’s also that dream, that hope, that you may just get your big break this time around – your Bart Simpson ‘I didn’t do it’ moment in the spotlight. If you’re not in, you can’t win and all that. 

But like most things in these parts, as regular readers will be aware by now, the best advice is as follows: Don’t whatsoever rely on it but if you have to, then do not, in any case, take it seriously.