Zika-dee-doo-dah

A quick glance through the Colombian newspapers (Bogotá-centred ones, anyway) or sitting down to watch the main TV news here and it's unlikely you'll read or hear much, if anything, about Zika. 

Indeed, most Bogotá residents have probably forgotten what it is. (In case you need reminding, it's that mosquito-spread virus which can be particularly dangerous, it is believed, if contracted by pregnant women as it can lead to severe brain malformations in the foetus and other birth defects. Such complications, though, may not be as bad as first feared, going by the findings of a recent study.)

Sure it could be worse ... (Image from Facebook.)

After being in the headlines constantly at the end of December last year and early this year, it pretty much seems to have gone off the radar for Colombian media — save for that new, slightly more positive report, linked above, questioning Zika's adverse effects on the foetuses of late-term pregnancies.

From a personal (and male) point of view, the furore it had created, and seemingly still creates in many Western countries, had been and is a little over the top. 

For most relatively healthy human beings, those who aren't pregnant anyway, being struck down with Zika isn't a major deal. The symptoms are pretty mild by all accounts. There would appear to exist far worse infections for us to be concerned about.

Of course, that it hasn't been a topic of conversation or cause for worry in Bogotá isn't at all surprising. This is because the mosquitoes that transmit the disease aren't found in these parts due to the city's lofty altitude. 

Granted, you only need to travel a short distance outside Bogotá or go to most of Colombia's other major cities and towns to come into 'Zika range', something that a good number of the capital's residents do on a regular basis. (Alas, that hasn't been my case this year, but that has nothing to do with Zika fears; a trip outside the metropolis is badly needed.) 

Nonetheless, the pandemic isn't causing consternation among the masses. (For the record, as of April this year, there were 65,726 cases of Zika reported in Colombia.)

In fact, were it not for a phone call from a concerned older cousin in Europe who is considering visiting Colombia, Zika wouldn't have entered my mind. Apparently, all the advice he's getting is to be very careful if he visits here due to the disease. 

Again, it's fair to say there are greater worries — be they from man, beast or insect — than Zika for anybody coming to Central or South America.

Now, maybe there's a bit of that renowned laid-back Latino attitude at play in all of this. Perhaps all of us living here should be a little more concerned about Zika, especially so those planning to have children due to that fetal abnormality issue.

Yet, from the safe heights of Bogotá it's a case of, 'out of sight, out of mind'. No point worrying about something that can't get to you, really. Now as for Colombia's dragged-out peace process, that's another story.
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Bring on Brexit

Let's face it, the United Kingdom — the parts of it that matter in England and Wales anyway — has never really been that pushed on the European Union. One foot in, one foot out kind of job. 

So should the UK's electorate do the, um, honourable thing and decide to leave the European Union, a Brexit as it's being called (a bit unfair to Northern Ireland, situated on the island of Ireland as it is), a whole raft of exciting, new opportunities looks set to come their way. Here we take a look at some of the standout ones:

Going down! (Image from Facebook.)

Eurovision: 'Eur havin' a laff!'

Europe's annual song contest, an event that has been running since 1956, used to have a bit of prestige — it did introduce the world to ABBA remember, while the UK had memorable winners in Brotherhood of Man, Bucks Fizz, and even Katrina and the Waves. 

However, in recent years it seems to have become less about the quality of songs and more about ridiculous on-stage antics. A Brexit would give the UK the perfect excuse to stand aside and leave those crazy eastern Europeans to it. (Perhaps Ireland could follow suit?)

Flood the Channel Tunnel

If the UK's relationship with Europe has been a bit love-hate its, nay England's, relationship with France has been much more hate than love down through the centuries. 

The Channel Tunnel/Eurotunnel that connects the two countries might be seen as a symbol of European integration and togetherness. Sod that. England should be erecting barriers to keep the French et al. out, not allowing them an easy route in. In the aftermath of a Brexit, Donald Trump will be on hand to help out in keeping those nasty foreigners at bay.

United England (and Wales)

Speaking of foreigners, the reality is that the heartbeat of the United Kingdom has always been England, with Wales in tow. Those guys on the peripheries, namely the Scots and Northern Irish, have generally been unstable nuisances. 

Voting to leave the EU could give the opportunity to do a bit of overdue pruning. The parsimonious Scots would have more reason to go it alone after chickening out a couple of years back. As for the Northern Irish, they might realise they've more in common with their southern brethren, finally putting an end to that 'damned Irish question' for Westminster.

Football's coming home

The English — the essence of the UK as we've already deciphered — invented football (or soccer if you will) as we know it (China doesn't count). Why then, should they have to pander to the likes of Uefa and Fifa? They should be dictating things, like the old empire used to do in many spheres back in the day. 

Exiting the European political union could open the door to re-evaluate how England does business with the rest of the continent from a football perspective. 

For example, if you'd all English referees at the European Championships, none of these diving prima donnas from the continent would get away with their antics and England would probably win the thing outright (or fail gloriously in a penalty shoot-out; plus ça change). 

Or if tournaments were just held in England, the country's football hooligans could engage in their regular, just-for-a-laff 'show of strength' without having to put up with all the, um, over-the-top international castigation.

Sticking with sport, a Brexit could also pave the way for a return to golf’s original Ryder Cup, that of Great Britain versus the USA. Heck, even if it was just English players on their own, they'd easily dispose of the States these days.

So there you have it; the future's looking bright, the future's Brexit.
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Crazy Copa América

It's fair enough to assume that most of us like at least a little stability in our lives. The comfort of knowing, barring absolute disasters, that you can rely on certain things.

Copa América: Embracing its unpredictability. (Image from Facebook.)

Even in the world of sport where stability, nay predictability, might not be what we always want, we do have certain bankers. 

You know, like in rugby where the All Blacks always win and in football where you can never write off the Germans. Sticking with the round-ball game — but something that is pretty much true of most sport — you also have the regularity of its main tournaments. The World Cup comes every four years, the same with the European Championships, on the even-numbered years between the global contest, as in this year.

Yet, as tends to be the wont in South America for many things, the Copa América arrives at any old time. It doesn't appear, or at least hasn't heretofore, to follow any plan. Well, if it does, it's not a straightforward one. (Maybe they're right on this one?)

Fair enough, this year's renewal, hot on the heels of Chile 2015, is marking the competition's centenary. Yet, it's not even being played on South American soil. No, it's taking place in the grand old US of A. 

At least it means that none of the Conmebol teams will have home advantage; but the USA will. It wouldn't exactly be the best of etiquette to throw a party in somebody else's gaff without inviting them, now would it?

Indeed, the venue choice has raised eyebrows among some of the participants, with Uruguay manager Óscar Washington Tabárez questioning the United States' suitability on this occasion, especially as games are going to be played all over the vast nation. His side, for example, will be travelling from west (Glendale) to east (Philadelphia) and back west (Santa Clara) again for their three group matches.

Whatever about the merits of this edition — the inclusion of six invitees, namely Costa Rica, Haiti, Jamaica, Mexico, Panama and hosts US, could be seen as weakening its credibility further — there is still a 'copa' to be won.

Looking at it from adopted-Colombian eyes, the competition gives José Pékerman's selection the opportunity to continue their unbeaten ways in competitive matches, having won two on the bounce in the World Cup qualifiers. It also represents a chance to erase the memories of a rather mediocre showing 12 months ago.

How far can Colombia go in the Copa this year? (Picture from Facebook.)

Their game with the United States on 03 June gets the tournament under way. Home advantage is usually a big help in the Copa América, but considering it is not the States' 'baby' so to speak, Colombia might be just that little more up for it (although the bookmakers, perhaps tellingly, see it differently).

A result in that one could set them up for a bit of a run, as Paraguay should be dispatched and Costa Rica, as one of the invited nations, mightn't be overly pushed. Yet making positive predictions about Colombia, as last year showed, is risky business.

That aside, it's likely the winner will come from one of South America's heavyweights. Take your pick from Argentina, Brazil, Chile or Uruguay (yep, we're going all out there). We'll be, um, 'patriotic' and include Colombia as well, but with a semi-final against Argentina, Chile or Uruguay on the cards should they get that far, making the decider might be just beyond them.

But hey, whatever the outcome, at least the Colombian team will have a few weeks in what is a second home for most of their fellow countrymen. Plus, there's always another Copa not too far away.
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Building an English 'Latin' America

Taking into account the grand history of our planet, it doesn't take long at all for us humans, judging by behaviour anyway, to feel that certain things are indisputably part of where we are from. 'It is what it is, and that's just that.'

From nature's point of view, where we haven't seriously altered the landscape, change, for the most part, does indeed take time. Nonetheless, it happens, whether we witness it in our lifetime or not.

The English, nay Yanks, are coming ...

As a species, we also go through constant changes, be they cultural, genetic, geographical or linguistic. On that last one, that a certain region speaks a certain language today does not mean, as history has shown us, it will always speak in that tongue.

Now, it could be argued that the days of regions' witnessing great language changes, as happened to the native populations of the Americas, are over. 

One reason for this is the very fact that there is more homogeneity in this regard than, let's say, 500 years ago. There are a few main languages that the majority of people speak with many minor ones just barely being kept alive.

Alongside this, we have one language that dominates internationally, especially in terms of business and tourism, that being English; or its Globish version in any case. 

Where French was the globe's lingua franca in the 18th and 19th centuries for diplomacy, international relations and other areas, English has taken that position; minus, though, much of the former's prestige.

This being so, seeing English gain close to parity with both Portuguese and Spanish amongst the masses here in South America is a future possibility.

It is by quirk of fate, and bad luck according to some, that Portuguese and Spanish are the common languages in these parts. For sure, over the centuries they have become culturally as much a part of the lands they cover as the Andes Mountains are physically. 

Yet, with the continued influence of its powerful neighbour to the north coupled with a belief that an ability to speak English well leads to better prospects and/or an improved quality of life (however true in reality that may be), South America's nascent anglicisation may gather momentum in the coming decades.

As it is, most of the region's more well-to-do, along with some not-so-well-off types who have seen it to be advantageous, already have a decent level of English. 

Here in Colombia, successive governments have made no secret of the fact that they would like to see the country bilingual — they just haven't come up with a winning formula yet, despite a few attempts launched with great fanfare. (There's also that love affair the country seems to have with the Union Jack.)

Another factor to consider is that the origin countries of the dominant languages here, Portugal and Spain, aren't exactly, to put it mildly, the global powers they once were. 

Thus, while internal, regional trade doesn't require English, international business with the world's biggest players is most likely to be conducted via the lingua franca. 

It may not be that much of a stretch to see Latinos drift more towards English in the decades to come; a slide away from one imposed language that has lost a certain usefulness and a drift towards another that has more clout.

You will also find those, Latinos and non-Latinos alike, who believe that Latin America would be in a better position financially, even culturally (if not aesthetically), if it had actually been 'Anglo-Saxon America' instead, pointing to the US and Canada as 'proof'. 

Whatever about a language benefit, to say this is to assume a lot and ignore a host of differences between North and South America when Europeans first came calling. 

There was the lack of any powerful pre-existing civilization in much of the former and, perhaps more significantly, no immediate, obvious riches to loot for the motherland, to name but two. (Guyana, as the only mainland South American state to have English as its official language, doesn't exactly have us looking on with envy.)

Of course, in all this we can be accused of taking for granted the continuance of English-language dominance. Frenchmen in the 18th Century probably thought the same about their language's position. 

However, at this remove, in a far more globalised world than when French was king, English's fall from a high any time soon seems hard to contemplate.

Those variable winds of change from the East surely can't blow in a new top language?
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Bogotá up in Smoak

Big city life, somewhat paradoxically, can be quite solitary. There are people all around us, yet as we go about our business they may as well not exist. Indeed, at times we might wish that to be the case.

In this regard, Bogotá is no different to any other metropolis (a few barrios excepted). Anonymous, insignificant faces abound.

This Smoak is on fire ...

However, one man is attempting to change this. Going by the belief that everybody has a story to tell — and in Colombia those stories can be quite something — coupled with his skills for photographing people, Jonathan Smoak has set about giving us a greater perspective to the faces we see in Bogotá on a daily basis.

Via his Facebook page Personajes de Bogotá (literally 'Characters of Bogotá'), he has been introducing us to the everyday characters around the city. 

The format is quite simple: a photo or two of the people in focus followed by a brief background blurb of their life story, in both English and Spanish. With more than 7,000 likes on his page so far, Smoak's virtual photo biography certainly seems to have found a niche.

The idea to create it partly came from the hugely popular Humans of New York, a Facebook page that has almost 18 million likes.

Another spark came from Smoak — whose previous humanitarian work has taken him to a host of developing countries — just being here in Bogotá itself. 

"I walk everywhere in the city. There are millions of people and I get a sense there's not much camaraderie, especially between classes and neighbourhoods", he explains. 

"I thought this (personajes) is a good way to humanise and connect races, classes, jobs, artistic communities, businesses — anything — and to say we all have a story."

While he tries to accommodate all sections of society on his page, he does reveal that some Bogotanos are more difficult to feature than others. "The higher up the socio-economic ladder I get, the more people say no." 

He acknowledges that security concerns in a city obsessed with such things, in many instances for sound reasons, probably play a factor in that. 

The fact that he’s a well-built man with a foreign face might also mitigate against him. Yet a few seconds in his company for anyone who might initially be intimidated and you'll find he's very much of the gentle variety.

Smoak's own life story has been quite the adventure. At three months of age his parents left their Virginia home to come to Colombia to work with a charity organisation that helped indigenous communities (it wasn't from nowhere he gained his charitable qualities). The country's secluded plains, in the department of Meta, were to be the family home for the next 17 years.

So while he isn't 'officially' Colombian, the country is another home to him in many ways. 

Yet, as he puts it, with such a background, one almost falls between two stools as to where home is: "Here, when I was growing up I was the 'gringo' and then when I went to the United States I was the strange kid from Colombia. In some sense when you're multicultural you don't have a true home; or they're both home."

Until this latest return to Colombia three years ago, the majority of his adult life was spent in the US, where he married and fathered four children. 

Images of a 'settled' life that might portray, but it was far from that. 

As a university student in Chicago he took a group of his peers to Honduras to install a potable water system in an isolated mountain village. "I did that because I was frustrated returning to the United States with so many people who were not socially and culturally aware of the world."

Out of that frustration emerged a future career where he continued to take university students to help out less well-off communities all over the globe. Countries that have benefitted from his humanitarian work include China, Honduras, India, Pakistan, the Philippines as well as the aforementioned Honduras.

Coming back to Colombia hadn't really been on the cards but a job offer that he just couldn't refuse saw him return. 

Unfortunately, that employment fell through. Not only that, but after setting up a photo studio he had the misfortune of having his top-of-the-range camera stolen last year. 

Despite these blows, he has set about making the country home again, be that temporary or otherwise. In fact, he has tinkered with the idea of doing here in Colombia the same non-profit, humanitarian work that he did elsewhere.

As for Personajes de Bogotá, the future goal is to publish a book with a collection of the best characters and their stories he has featured on the Facebook page. 

In the meantime, keep your eyes peeled for the affable Smoak traversing Bogotá's streets, camera in hand. 

Don't be shy guys, he's just trying to make the world a friendlier, more inclusive place.
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Bogotá's house of pain

We've all had our 'horror' stories when renting rooms, especially in shared accommodation — those of us who have to endure such things that is. In a (slowly) developing city such as Bogotá, less-than-positive experiences in this regard are, perhaps, more commonplace than in other places. Finding a decent abode at a reasonable price for what's on offer can be quite a chore.

'Can I have a wash & microwave dry, please?'

Indeed, in this day and age, some lodgings should never be made available for rent to the general public. What's more, some people just shouldn't be landlords/landladies. It's that second point that chiefly concerns us here.

Basically, in the early months of this year, this writer had the displeasure of renting a room from a woman who wants all the benefits of being a landlady but accepts pretty much none of the responsibilities.

Fair enough, it was always going to be a temporary solution, yet the initial trappings that came with the lofty monthly rent of $600,000 COP gradually disappeared during the rather painful two-month stay.

You had a table and chairs taken from the communal area, the place where we'd eat and work as there were no desks in the rooms (and who wants to eat food in a window-less room in any case?). This was done without prior warning, the house owner's standard practice as we came to learn.

She also left us without a washing machine for a number of days. A replacement was eventually installed, but one that was quite temperamental.

Despite numerous reminders, bathroom leaks went unfixed. All this at a time when the government was pleading — and continues to plead — conservation.

I managed to find alternative accommodation shortly after the communal table went AWOL. For my friend who also stayed there the agony continued for another month; and things got worse.

The landlady regularly promised to get another table and chairs, but such utterances were about as empty as her stomach is large — let's just say her girth is of some size.

The point of no return for my friend was the arrival of a couple from the Dominican Republic — who were put up in the garage — and the changes made around the house to accommodate them.

Apparently, the woman in that relationship is a hairdresser and obviously plans to start her profession from the garage-cum-studio apartment. 'Obviously' is used here because a sink for washing hair was installed in the kitchen (see photo above) — yes, in the communal kitchen where people prepare their meals, 'conveniently' placed beside the microwave. 'Would you like a wash and microwave dry today?' Wonderfully hygienic, that.

It's probably fair to say this isn't legal, but if it means the landlady earns some more money, that's the most important thing for her. To heck with standards and regulations.

It must be pointed out that the owner and her family also live in the house, on the second floor. The thing is, they rarely use the facilities as, get this, they own a hotel nearby and spend most of their time there. 

One can only hope that Casa Fratelly — the name of the hotel, one to avoid — is a little bit more organised and well-kept. Or maybe our esteemed landlady took lessons from the 'Basil Fawlty School of Hotel Management', and, um, 'improved' upon them.

Whatever the case, pity the poor soul who next takes up residence in Bogotá's house of pain.
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Recalling Ireland's 'terrible beauty'

For many occurrences in life, it is easy to be wise after the event. Yet, while this Sunday, 24 April marks the passing of 100 years since the start of Ireland’s 1916 Easter Rising, no one can say with any certainty what the men and women behind it should or should not have done. 

‘A terrible beauty is born’ is how the great Irish poet, William Butler Yeats, summed up the contrasting emotions of the time. In many ways, it continues to be viewed thus.

Knocking down the old structures to start anew. (Photo from Facebook.)

It's probably fair to say that had there been a national plebiscite at the time to rebel or not, the latter would have won the day. This is not to say that a majority on the island did not want a change in how the country was governed, more that past experiences of failed uprisings had surely left the populace sceptical that a new attempt would succeed. 

The lack of popular support and indifference that history records when the rising broke out suggest this. (On the democratic front, one can also point to the many occasions when the concerns of the Irish masses were ignored by their colonial masters.)

Yet, it didn't take long for that to change; vindication for the actions of the Rising’s leaders in a sense. However, their stated aim was to achieve an all-island republic; this, of course, did not happen and has not happened.

Taking into account the political developments at Westminster at the time, it seems that some sort of Home Rule would have been granted once World War One was over, with perhaps separate parliaments for both Dublin and Belfast, considering the vehement opposition to the idea in the north-east. 

In other words, something very similar to the agreement actually reached between Britain and Ireland in the years after 1916. Or it may have even led to a devolved parliament for a united Ireland, remaining part of the United Kingdom albeit.

Therefore, it could be suggested that the rising and subsequent guerrilla war were unnecessary. Moreover, these further deepened the north-south divide.

On the other hand, we can only assume that a solely political path would have led to Home Rule. Diplomacy had failed in the past, which led some to believe that a forceful ‘stick’ approach was needed to get any meaningful concessions from Britain.

It is in this light we have to judge the actions of those who carried out the 1916 Rising. They did what they felt was necessary at the time.

With the benefit of hindsight, you could argue, as some do, that it was the wrong move. 

Be that as it may, respect must be given to those who made what was for many akin to a suicidal attack on the forces of what they viewed as an oppressive regime.
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